Minnie has two favored spots these days, the top of the hay bales, where she cannot be seen, and on the seat of the old lawn mower, especially when the sun falls upon the vinyl and warms it. Mostly Minnie has returned to her life as a barn cat, she catches mice and rats and hunts in the garden and the barn. She is a verbal creature, Minnie has lots to say.
Flo lives on the other end of the farmhouse, in and under the porch, sometimes in the barn. It is inspiring to see Minnie make her way up to the top of the hay bales on her three legs.
I met Mary Kellogg when she was 79, she sat on my porch at Bedlam Farm and told me she had written poetry and never shown it to anyone, even her beloved husband Dick, who died some years before we met. She showed me the poetry and I showed it to my new friend Maria – we shared a passion for creativity and encouragement. Soon, we worked to publish two volumes of Mary’s wonderful poems – “My Place On Earth,” and “Whistling Woman.” Mary marked the beginning of our friendship as well as her emergence as a respected and beloved poet.
Mary writes about connection, independence, family, she has sold more than 1,000 copies of her work. We became close friends, when I began dating Maria, Mary was the first person I told. “Oh, how lovely,” she said. “She will keep you in line.” She was right.
Mary is 84 now, she has been a presence at every Open House we have ever had, reading her old and new poems – we are working together on a third volume. Maria and I were both sad to learn that Mary will not be able to make this open house, she is suffering from a recurrence of painful Lyme Disease. We went to see her today, brought her some soup and a scone from the Round House Cafe. She has lost a great deal of weight and been in some pain.
Mary lives on a 30-acre farm at the top of a winding road in one of the most remote corners of our county. Mostly, she takes care of the property herself and she loves ever square inch of it, she says she never plans to leave, Mary does not follow the suffocating expectations of being older in our culture, she lives life on her own terms, drives sick people to the doctor, she is the Whistling Woman.
We will miss her great spirit at the Open House, but I plan on reading some of her poems and Maria will sell copies of her poetry books in the Schoolhouse Studio. Mary knows what her place on earth is, she knows where she is in life, but she is determined to live every day in a meaningful and generous way. She is one of the most admirable people I have ever known, and I will be thinking of her Saturday and Sunday, where she would always stand in the middle of a big circle and share her wonderful work.
Mary still cannot say why she never showed her poetry to anyone, she admits it was probably because no one had ever encouraged her. Once someone did, she is off and running and running still. We plan on publishing her third volume of poetry in the Spring, it is as yet untitled.
I was stunned last week to learn that my new book “Saving Simon,” had been orphaned by my publisher, no money for an online book tour, no money for an old-style book store. It’s a great connection, an orphaned donkey and and an orphaned book. So I shook myself off and decided to battle back, launching my own book store. It will take me awhile to get rolling, but here’s what I have so far:
– On Thursday, November 6, at 7 p.m, I will talk and sign books at the Petersburgh, New York, Public Library, I will be talking in the Town Hall, right next to the town library. Red is coming with me.
– At 3 p.m., on Sunday, November 23, I will be at the Wilton Library, New Canaan, Connecticut, courtesy of Elm St. Books (check the time and dates, please.) Red is coming there also.
– Next May, I will be traveling to Des Moines and Iowa City, Iowa to talk at a library, a bookstore – Prairie Lights – and a residential community. Details to come.
– On December 5 and 6, I will be at the Northshire Bookstores in Saratoga and Manchester, respectively. Check your local listings. Evening talks and signings. I plan to fill up some of the space in between.
More to come. I am not inclined to be orphaned, at least not quietly. I blame no one but me for my publishing fate, I am responsible for my own fate, I got the message late, but I got it. More cities, libraries and bookstores to come. I can’t afford to fly myself around, so we have to negotiate places and travel. Will be sticky but exciting. My publisher did not budget a single dollar for bookstore appearances. They didn’t budget a dollar for online appearances either. I will see this as an opportunity to be creative and grow.
In the meantime, you can order my books from the Battenkill Bookstore, my local bookstore. I will sign and personalize each book, the first 2,000 buyers will get a free signed photo postcard of Simon, all will be eligible for potholders, photos notecards (don’t have enough for everybody.) You can also call the store at 518 677-2515. Thanks for supporting me and independent bookstores. Battenkill is a big part of the new book tour. A good home for orphans.
Minnie and Lenore have lived together every day of their lives. When Minnie came as a feral kitten to live in the Bedlam Farm barn, we didn’t see her for months, Lenore was the only animal she trusted, she would come out and rub against her, Lenore often licks her on the top of her head. Lenore doesn’t really know she is a big dog, she is terrified of Flo and runs and hides whenever Flo is around. When Minnie had her leg amputated, she would curl up against Lenore and purr. They have seen each other for a part of every day of their lives, there is great trust and affection between them.
I see these friendships all the time with farm animals, they make decisions about who to trust and who to avoid. Every day, in the yard, these two sit together and observe the comings and goings of the world. No one will see Minnie at the Open House, she is shy of strangers. She will most likely be hiding in the hay bales in the barn.
For the third year in a row, we are opening our farm and some of our lives to the world. The Bedlam Farm Open House. A gorgeous fall, the leaves are rioting here. So many people warned me against doing this, and for so many reasons. They assured me I would regret it, I never have.
I am ever grateful we chose to have our Open Houses. The idea of openness has become a seminal part of my life in recent years. Nobody is or should be totally open – there are many facets of my life with Maria that do not appear on my blog or in my books.
But openness is bigger than that for me. Openness meant permitting love to come into my life and accepting the great risk of intimacy. This brought me Maria. Openness meant accepting Frieda and learning to love her. Openness meant making friends, permitting myself to be vulnerable in front of other people. Openness meant opening up to a spiritual life, to new ideas, to things I did not understand, even feared.
it meant being open to the idea that what was happening to the New York Carriage Horses and the people who live and work with them was unjust.
Openness meant accepting Simon when he was taken off of his farm, it meant being open to Karen Thompson’s idea that Red was a dog that the forces of the universe meant for me to have. It meant starting my blog, my Facebook page. It meant accepting change, not just whining about it. Openness for me meant being open to the idea that I needed to leave the first Bedlam Farm, move to a different farm, lead a different kind of love. I wanted a home that was both Maria’s and mine, not just mine, and we found one.
I am more open than ever now to other ideas, different kinds of people. Openness has helped squeeze the anger and fear out of my life, it is a process that is never truly completely, a work underway.
When I open the farm to people – friends and strangers – I am opening myself to trust, I am sharing the bounty of my life, I am connecting with other human beings in the most meaningful way. It is a gift to me to see how much people love my farm, the dogs, sweet Simon, Maria and her art. This farm is not majestic like the first one, it is simple, small classic old farm. It fits me and Maria like a glove. This ought to be shared, it gives pleasure to others, to me, to us.
Everyone tells me we will have a big crowd this weekend, perhaps so, it doesn’t matter a whole lot. I love seeing Maria show off and sell her wonderful works in the Schoolhouse Studio, her palace, and I love showing the world how Red works so wonderfully with sheep. It absolutely lifts my heart to see how happy and healthy Simon is, how much he loves the attention he will get.
And I love doing this all with Maria, the greatest gift of my opening up. Beyond all this, there is my own life to celebrate. This year, I opened to the idea that I needed help, I was struggling. It saved my life. I was only a walk or two away from not being at this Open House at all, or at any other. As the cardiologist told me, the good news is that I am not dead.
Good news indeed, and it imbues the Bedlam Farm Open House – getting underway Saturday morning at ll a.m. – with a special richness and urgency for me. My broken heart has been healing as quickly as possible. I am more than ready, I am grateful for every person that I see. Open House, Open Life, Open Heart.
