Today was the third anniversary of the Round House Cafe. There was a small celebration – a cake cutting.
Maria and I went there to have brunch and eat some cake with Scott and Lisa Carrino, the co-owners.There is a lot happening at the Round House these days, the cafe was mobbed, its the talk of the town. People want to help.
Yesterday, I got a long e-mail from a long-time local resident. She loves the cafe and donated $25 hard-earned dollars to their fund to help them buy the cafe building, which the landlord has put up for sale. A lot of people from all over the country want to save the Round House and the idea of community.
The fund, a week old, has already raised more than $27,000.
“I gave right away,” the woman wrote, “but my son doesn’t care to contribute. He says it’s a new cafe where newcomers and “artsy” people go.” She loves having a local cafe and wants it to stay. The different points of view speak to community, what it means and how differently people see it, even within a family.
Scott and Lisa are quite vocal about being inclusive, everyone is welcome there, but people have different tastes and different values. There has long been a feeling in our small town, as in many other towns with an influx of new people, that there are “locals” and “new people.” Many of us cross those boundaries – most of our friends are people whose families have been there for generations, and plenty of “locals” eat at the Round House, more all the time.
There are some innate tensions. Newcomers tend to different political views and different tastes in food. Lots of newcomers – especially those from New York City – have a sometimes well-deserved reputation for arrogance and a lack of respect for local realities – like the smell of manure coming from farmers fields.
Some local people earn their living taking care of the homes and problems of newcomers, that is not always a simple relationship.
In recent years, these tensions seem to have faded, there are very few conflicts that amount to much.
But some people don’t care to cross those lines and perhaps see the cafe as a bit woo-woo and organic. That is their right, it is diversity that makes community in so many ways. The Round House definitely has an organic, fresh flowers on the table, very carefully-prepared food, almost urban aura. There is nothing there that is fried or frozen or processed. That is not always typical of country restaurants.
Community does not mean we all speak with one mind, it also means celebrating and acknowledging differences. I see all kinds of people at the Round House now, new and old. And lots of local kids and singers and musicians come to the cafe’s open mike talent nights. It just sometimes takes some time.
Some differences never die. If I lived here for a century, I would not ever be considered a local. But I feel accepted and welcome here, as much or more as any place I have ever lived. Some of my closest friends are farmers, I love them, and feel loved and accepted by them, even though we are quite different in some ways.
People may differ in some of their views, but there is great tolerance for others and what they do and believe. A number of gay artists and writers moved up here in the 60’s and 70’s because it was cheaper and more beautiful than urban life. Most all of them say they felt safer and more accepted her than they ever did in New York City.
Some people like me, some people may not. When I lived in the New Jersey suburbs, I felt like an alien, and I was. I have never felt that here, neither has Maria. But I feel this is my home now, and I cherish the sense of community I feel here. When there is trouble, nobody asks where you came from, they just come running.
I told the woman who messaged me that I appreciated her generosity and respect her son’s choices. Crowdsourcing is profoundly democratic – nobody has to give if they don’t care to give, and their reasons are their own business.
I’ve always considered Scott and Lisa heroes of a mind.
They are not the Hollywood kind of heroes, they don’t stop bullets or fly through space and battle alien invaders. They bleed, they suffer, they make mistakes, they are not without struggle and pain. They have struggled for years to build and make community here.
They have great powers in their own way. They are devoted to their community, they listen, they love, they accept, they work every day and most of every night to prepare fresh and good and healthy food, they have made their cafe a gathering place for people of all kinds, perhaps most deliberately for those without extended families here, for newcomers, for the elderly, for farmers, and yes, for artists and poets and writers.
They have helped countless local kids, mentored them, offered camps and retreats, classes and workshops, given them jobs. The cafe is staffed by the hard-working children of local people, many of them farm families. Scott and Lisa have always been generous with their gifts to others and respectful of the idea of community. It has not always been easy for them, in fact, it has never been easy for then.
They have never been rich and do not expect to be, they do not have fat retirement accounts waiting to take them to a life of leisure down the road. People come to the roundhouse with their laptops to work. They meet friends and visitors here. People come for a cup of coffee before work. To get out of the cold when they are taking a walk. To take their elderly mothers and fathers out for a sandwich. To get pizza on a Friday night. For a good meal to eat when they have no time to shop or cook. To catch up on local gossip and meet newcomers. To be in a bright and colorful place.
These are immeasurable things when it comes to community, impossible to value or quantify. They are somewhat heroic to me. Maria wrote about them today in her own simple and graceful way: Happy Birthday Round House: What Would I Do Without You?
There is a powerful and safe feeling there. The staff is courteous, warm, the food can be trusted, sooner or later half the town streams through, you can figure out what’s going on, get the news, hear who is sick, who has passed on, who is new.
It is important to us, and to so many others. The Round House is a focal point and grounding point for our lives. We have lost much community in our town, today an awful lot of us gathered to with the Round House a happy birthday, and many, many more. Thanks to so many of you, I believe community will survive here in Cambridge, the money you are sending from everywhere will open the door for them to save their cafe.
Community is everywhere, close and far. If you have contributed to the fund to save the Round House Cafe, thanks. If you want to, you can do so by going here. If you choose not to or can’t, thanks for reading.