Day: November 15, 2017

I’ve been away from the Mansion for a few days, recovering from a brutish head cold and cough. The residents noticed my absence, and there was a line of people waiting to see me and talked to me. I felt needed and loved, and I felt much love in return, and perhaps need also.

Sylvie came out of her room to see me and pose for a portrait. She loves to have her portrait taken, and she told me of the loves in her life that she lost because of mental illness. Sylvia can tell the most powerful stories without blinking an eye.

Joan was waiting for me at the doorway to take her and help her find her room. Apparently she waited for me sometimes at the door when I was gone, even though she does not know my name or Red’s.

She always asks me, “can you help me find where I live?” She takes my arm and we walk down the stairs and I take  her to her room, it says “Joan” on the front, and she hugs me and gives me a kiss on the cheek. She is sweet and mystical, and sometimes the most wonderful stories come out of her, when she is clear.

I sat with Rob and felt sad about the pain he was in. He is not able to eat much and his medications are taking their toll on  him, so is his illness.

I sat down on the sofa with Bill, an 84-year-old man who had a severe stroke a year ago and who wants to reconnect with the gay world he once was a part of. He told me he had been asleep for two days, and he vaguely remembered someone reading a book to him.

He couldn’t remember what it was. He is settling into the Mansion, I can tell, he is so much more comfortable there than he was when I met him a couple of months ago. I will get him some more books.

Jean sat with me and Red for nearly a half hour, it was sweet and poignant, she told me stories about her family and her late husband.

I stopped in Connie’s room, it is empty, Red went to sniff the yard in her big baskets, al gifts of the Army Of Good.

Art showed me his biblical quotes, plastered all over his new shirts. He is starting a new business, he says, spreading the literal word of God. He’s already sold a few shirts.

I met with the staff and we talked as freely as we could about how the residents are doing. The aides are very discreet and will not discuss medical information with anyone, and I don’t ask. I know what I see. Once a week, I fund pizza night for the overnight staff, they deserve every slice.

One of the residents urged me to stop and talked to her, and she told me she was lonely and had no friends at the Mansion she knew it was probably her fault, she was standoffish and depressed. She wanted to know if I could help.

I said I was sorry to hear this, but I couldn’t help, she should tell a member of the staff about it. I said I don’t give that kind of advice at the Mansion or anywhere else. I am just there to fill the holes in people’s lives that I can see and reach.

I loved today at the Mansion, I loved the feeling of belonging and feeling needed. Thanks for your support of this work, we are doing good every day.

Art has spent most of his sparse dollars on new shirts carrying various Biblical verses on pornography  and homosexuality, including the somewhat infamous Romans 1, verses 22-32, the Biblical condemnation of homosexuality.

He found a printer to print them, and takes cabs and hitches rides to pick them up and pay for them.

He was eager to show them to me and read them to me.

It isn’t what he says,  he told me, but what God says.

He sells his shirts to members of his church, sometimes to people on the street,  and wears them as often as he can around the Mansion. When I ask  him if people get upset, he just twinkled, winks,  and say he has always upset people, it’s what he does.

I asked him if I thought that people sometimes hide behind God, and he looked at me strangely and said nothing.

If he ever stops arguing with people, I know he will miss it.

Art has eye treatment recently and he can now see well enough to read. I am going over some lists of books he might want me to get for him. I am still talking to his son about calling him, so far no luck.

Art came to live in the Mansion from Montana, he wanted to be near his brother before his brother died, and he as. He says he wants to go home, but he also seems drawn to say.

Art wanted to know what I think of his new shirts.

I told him God and I did not speak directly (he hopes to save me from that belief), and that my role at the Mansion was to support him in any  reasonable way, not to argue with him or talk politics or religion.

I have told him I have gay male and women friends and appreciate them.

I said I could not and would not participate in the denigration of anyone. The staff has come to understand Art and appreciate him, they ignore his sometimes bombastic declarations. I am told he can be sweet. He keeps a close eye out for Joan, who has severe memory problems, and often guides her to where she wants to go..

I am quite clear on my role, his personal beliefs are not my business, he will not ever lure me down that path. I smiled at Art when he showed me his new shirts, I said it is very interesting to meet someone who is so passionate about his beliefs.

My job is very clear and Art reinforces it for me. I am not there to only support people I agree with or even like.

I do like Art, and I respect his commitment to his beliefs. The rest is not my business.

I did ask Art if he wishes to have me read some of St. Augustine to him. He said yes, for sure.

Art is perceptive, and although I don’t discuss my religious or social beliefs with him, he intuitively knows how I feel. I don’t know too many people who wear their values on their stomachs. Red doesn’t have much to do with him, and he pats Red on the head but not all that interested in therapy dogs.

Art accepts that in me, and describes as one of his closest friends. I don’t have a lot of friends.

I know he believes he is doing God’s work in every way. I know he is a lonely man who has lived a hard life and is in need of friends and support.

You can write Art c/o Art The Mansion, 11 S. Union Avenue, Cambridge, N.Y., 12816. He will always be honest with you.

Red and I visited Bob at the Mansion. He is ill right now, and struggling. He is taking some powerful medications and finds it hard to walk even short distances. He is one of the sweetest and most gracious men I have known.

Bob and Shirley left the home that Bob built a few months ago, she died recently of cancer, and he moved to a smaller room on the first floor. Bob and I talk often, I came today to sit with him and bring him his month copy of Builder Magazine, which I subscribed to because he loves to read it.

He can’t read now, or eat much, and I could see he was in considerable pain. Through all that, he asked me about our trip to New Mexico and told me he was impressed with me. I told him I was impressed with him.

I saw him nursing his food, but he is unable to eat much of it. I shifted to active listening, my job is not to cheer him up or make him any false promises, it is to meet him where he is. So although we usually talk easily, we sat in silence, and Red dropped to the floor and was still.

I asked him what I can do for him, and he said nothing, he has yet to read most of the magazines and books I brought him. I told him I understand, when  you feel poorly you don’t  feel like doing much of anything.

You can write to Bob c/o The Mansion, 11 S. Union Avenue, Cambridge, N.Y., 12816.

Jean dearly loves Red and all dogs, and misses having her own. This afternoon, we were walking down the halls and Jean’s door was open, she came to the door and invited Red to come in. I asked him to  hop up on the bed so Jean could reach him more easily, and she was grateful for that.

She has a photo of one of her dogs above her bed.

The two communed and hugged for about 20 minutes, it means so much to Jean. She has a toy dog bed with a stuffed bed on the floor next to her bed. You can write Jean, c/o Jean, The Mansion, 11 S.Union Avenue, Cambridge, N.Y., 12816.

The Mansion recently welcomed a couple, Ruth (above) and her husband Ken. Ruth is full of love and smiles, she is a lot of fun. I was told she needed a nightshirt and lo and behold, one arrived from the Army of Good almost immediately.

Ruth loves the nightshirt.

I don’t know how they knew. You can write to Ruth and Ken at The Mansion, 11 S. Union Avenue, Cambridge, N.Y., 12816.

Connie Update. She is still at the Wesley Rehabilitation Center, 121 Lawrence Street,  Saratoga Springs, 12886. She is undergoing treatment and will either return to the Mansion or be sent to a nursing home in the area.