14 July

Humility

by Jon Katz
Humility

If you should ask him what are the ways of God, wrote St. Augustine, he would reply that the first was humility, the second was humility, and the third was still humility. If humility does not precede all that we do, most of our efforts will be fruitless, he said.

Humility, most simply put, is freedom from pride or arrogance. The  dictionary says humility is the quality or state being humbled.

Humility is not about having all the answers, it is about knowing that I do not have any of the answers, at least not for other people.

I think nothing has taught me humility more than self-awareness. Like many men, I learned humility the hard way, through  failure, humiliation and helplessness, as I saw my life draft away from me, year after.

Humility is about recognizing what i don’t know rather than what I do. I am now painfully aware of my shortcomings as a human being, I no longer need others to point it out to me. I start out by recognizing that I am ignorant, I know precious little of life or the world being my own narrow life, I have never studied much beyond what I need to live.

If I were religious  would say I am a sinner, and I suppose I am, but since I am not religious, I would just say I do not know enough to tell other people what to do, or what is wrong, or to impose my will on anyone.

Jesus and Pope Francis both washed have washed the feet of the poor and the needy, humility is about recognizing that we are not superior to anyone.

I have determined that smallness plays a big role in my life I am not powerful, I am small, not of great significance to the world. I live a small life on a small farm in a small town, and it is just where I belong.

I have no place at parties, shows and competitions, literary festivals and awards ceremonies. I feel humility at the Mansion, where good and honest people cling to life and struggle for comfort and dignity and peace.

I feel small around the refugee women, many of who have lost everything and endured horrible atrocities, but  move with grace and courage to rebuild their lives and give hope to their children. I have no right to complain about my life.

I have learned one of Gandhi’s great lessons: “It is unwise to be too sure of one’s wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err.” I have weakened and erred so many times i hardly need to be reminded of the truth of this.

Mother Teresa said one can practice humility by speaking as little as possible of one’s self.

Hemingway wrote that there is nothing noble about feeling superior to other people true nobility comes from being superior to your former self.

The historians say the life of Christ was nothing but a perpetual humiliation, and I think this is true of many great men – Gandhi, Dr. King, the Dalai Lama,  Abraham Lincoln, Nelson Mandela. I wonder if men need to be tortured as children or humiliated as adults to be humble.

I think I needed that. Emerson wrote that a great man is always willing to be little. I have learned that a great lesson in life – even fools are right at times, and have something to say.

“I have been driven many times upon my knees,” wrote Lincoln, “by the overwhelming conviction that I had nowhere else to go. My own wisdom and that of all about me seemed insufficient on that day.”

My own wisdom seems insufficient to me every day, so I have learned to follow my heart instead.

Being humble to me is recognizing that I am small and  insignificant. I don’t need to take the world upon my shoulders, or even a President, or a painfully divided country. I am small, one person at a time, one thing at a time, small acts of great kindness, small explorations of peace.

That is where I belong. Today, a small trip, a day off, we are off to see a play, stay in a funky old motel, eat some  Mexican or Indian food. Back tomorrow.

 

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