12 December

A Beautiful And Heartswelling Story From Subway: A Tale Of Two Women. One Is Disabled, The Other Is Showing Her There Is So Much She Can Do

by Jon Katz

If you want to see how love works in the hearts of good people, come to Subway in Cambridge, New York, and watch Therese and Faith work together.

This happy story began when I stopped at Subway (I often stop there for lunch sandwiches when we’re too busy to cook) to bring lunch home. The Subway Manager, Therese Balls-Suarez, was cheerful and smiling. She has a trademark greeting when anyone else orders a sandwich; she practically shouts, “You Got It.”

Therese is the heart and soul of the place; she has a name and greeting for almost everyone who enters the shop and makes everyone feel welcomed and special.  I considered her a friend the first day I met her.

Standing beside her behind the corner was a quiet young woman named Faith. Something was different about her; she caught my attention.

I thought Faith was a trainee, and I guess she was. She is very different from Therese, although the two worked efficiently and quickly with one another.

Faith didn’t say much verbally, but she smiled and put my sandwich together in just a few seconds, and it was done perfectly. She seemed to have an excellent memory; Therese said she was brand new to the job but already knew where everything was.

I can’t explain it, but Faith and I immediately hit it off. Something inside me said we were part of the same community and understood one another. That doesn’t happen often.

I was startled, then enchanted. Therese is an angel with extraordinary powers. Subway is fortunate to have her.

Faith seemed hesitant to talk to me at first, something I respected,  but something mystical happened before her sandwich was done. We seemed to be one with one another right away. I could see how much she trusted Therese and then how much she got comfortable with me. We joked and smiled a bit. She made a perfect sandwich in minutes, precisely as I asked for.

I sensed she came to trust me as well. People with disorders need to understand that there are many things they can do well if people give them the chance. Therese is giving Faith that chance.

When Faith stepped away from the counter for a minute, Therese explained that Faith had what is now called an Intellectual Disability and had worked with two other Intellectually Disabled students from the high school to work on a new program at this Subway meant to get “disabled” kids out of the classroom and into the world, proving in the process that they could work as hard and as well as anyone.

Faith, said Therese, was the most instantly capable worker she had ever had. I could see the truth of this. Faith worked fast and efficiently, remembering every world Therese had taught her.

If the students find jobs and do well, Washington County, our county,  will pay the corporations that hire them, at least for a while.

And in one or two visits, Faith had her following. She made great sandwiches, and customers began rooting for her and wanting to help. Business swelled when she was there (she comes once or twice a week for now) along with school officials Marlee Wood and  Tanya Lathrop, who run a unique program to find work for their disabled students.

Marlee and Tanya sent out flyers to dozens of businesses, but only Therese from Subway has responded so far. Therese, I noticed, is a natural teacher – transparent, honest, enthusiastic, quick to praise, and supportive. “I raised an autistic child,” she said, “I have a soft part in my heart for kids who are on the spectrum.”

Faith, said Tanya, “is more than capable of doing anything put in front of her.” Amen, said Therese, “you got it!”

It’s almost impossible not to love Therese; she seems to be bursting with good energy and empathy, two emotions struggling to survive in modern America. The program lit her up from the first, and she immediately earned Faith’s trust and respect.  She fought for her to come to Subway. You are a wonder, I told Therese, “loud and loving.”

I, too, have a soft part for children on the spectrum; I suspect I was one.

Perhaps it was my Dyslexia, but I connected to Faith right away. People with Dyslexia often suffer the same struggles as people with disabilities. We make people nervous, and they often confuse illness with laziness or incompetence. Faith is anything but loud. But she has a movie-class smile.

I asked her a question or two the first time I saw her. I was curious, and she was reluctant to respond but soon began to smile and talk with me.

That was unusual so fast, said Therese. It takes Faith a while to be comfortable with strangers.

I told Therese I’d love to return to Subway on a Thursday when  Faith was there.  Therese jumped at the idea, as did Faith’s mother, teachers, and school officials.

They were eager to get the word out about their children, who, they said, are willing to work and very good at it. It was as if they were waiting for me or someone like me to come along.

Marlee and Tanya said they and Faith practiced being interviewed all week. Faith had never been questioned before, and they practiced a half dozen times.

“Don’t sweat it,” Therese told me,” she’s tougher than you are.”

This advice turned out to be true.

Faith could hardly be more relaxed and articulate than she was when we sat down together to talk.

She answered every question I asked quickly and articulately. The only one that slowed her down was when I asked her what she wanted most in her life: “I want to work here at Subway,” she said.

I could see the interview was important to her. It meant something to me, too.

Faith had an older sister who had worked at Subway, and “I want to be like her,” she said.

She doesn’t know what she wants to do far down the road; I sensed she’d love to be Therese one day. I told her that after speaking with her, I really couldn’t imagine too many things that she couldn’t do if she wanted to.

I knew she was nervous about the interview, so I told her a half dozen times that she had done beautifully without a hitch. I was impressed, I told her.

She was sweating it, but never showed it.

As she got up, she broke into a huge grin and gave a big thumbs up to Marlee and Tanya, sitting two tables away and watching closely.

I could see that Faith needed to hear that, and I was happy to say it. It was the truth. I kept the interview short, but we made plans to talk more next Thursday when she comes to work again.

She surprised me. There was nothing disabled in her that I could see, and I’ve interviewed many people. While I watched, she made sandwich after sandwich, fast and perfectly. Therese beamed over her shoulder like a loving mom. Every time I looked at Faith, she was smiling. I gathered she doesn’t smile a lot.

I returned today (Maria came with me; she loves this idea) to write about her and follow her work and evolution at Subway.

I met at first with Marlee and Tanya to go over any questions and make sure everyone involved had agreed to let me take pictures and talk to Faith. I also wanted to know her sensitivities so I wouldn’t upset her by asking something that might bother her.

This is not something I ever did as a reporter; I just jumped in and asked away. But Faith is different.

(Marlee and Tanya (above) are hero teachers; they reminded me of Sue Silverstein and her fantastic work with traumatized refugee children. Great teachers all have a haunted, worn-out, loving, and vigilant look. They work hard, are little recognized, are poorly paid, don’t sleep much, never rest,  and are utterly devoted. They love their students dearly, even if their hard work is little acknowledged. I wish everyone had teachers like them. It took a lot of effort to get Faith to Subway.)

I said I wanted to follow her as she moved from this program to a regular job, which Therese said she was eager to offer her. Faith is 18 years old; she can remain in school until age 24 or leave earlier if she chooses. “People don’t know what these children are capable of,” Marlee told me,” that’s the point of the program, to let them know.”

“She’s as good as any worker I’ve ever had her,” Therese said, “she’s smart, has a photographic memory, and loves to work. I have a lot of young people coming through here,” she said, “and I’ve never had a quicker learner or a better worker. I want very much for her to work here.”

Therese said Subway executives are excited about the program.

There was a lot of love, patience, and kindness around Faith and her work at Subway today. I saw several customers say hello and tell her what a good job she was doing. Therese says her customers are behind the program, rooting for Faith and eager to help her if they can.

There is another hero in this story: Therese, who has the heart of a skyscraper and lives to do good. She needs to be acknowledged for changing the lives of at least one young person. As long as people like her are around, no one will ever persuade me that there are not many good and compassionate people in America.

I asked Therese if I could come in regularly and follow Faith’s story and see if perhaps the Army of Good or I could help her if needed. I want to be there. Maria is aboard. Faith said sure, so did Marlee and Tanya.

I felt the same way about Faith as the other customers.

Before we left, Maria and I invited Faith and the other program students to visit the farm, bring some carrots for the donkeys, and meet Zip and the sheep, donkeys, dogs, and chickens.

Faith looked a little hesitant. “Is something the matter?” I asked.

She paused for a minute. “I like horses,” she said as if I might be offended.

Then, after thinking about it, “But I could like donkeys too.”

That’s good news, I said, “because Lulu and Fanny will almost certainly love you. They love young people. ” She said she loved their names.

Stay tuned. This is a story I am keen to follow.

12 December

Still Life: Morning Sun Reflections And Windowsill Art

by Jon Katz

 

I’m heading to a Subway franchise, which is experimenting along with the local school of hiring Autistic children to prove to the world that they are capable of doing just about anything. With parental school and student approval, I will talk to a couple of kids working in this program and photographing them. They are doing an excellent job of busting stereotypes and misconceptions. I’m excited. I’ll write about it, of course, and thanks to Theresa, the complimented and compassionate Subway manager who is supporting this program and making it work.

30 November

Decorations For The Farmer’s Market Christmas Tree And Jewelry And Sweaters For The Mansion

by Jon Katz

I did some good today.

I’ve made a significant discovery in the Senior Citizens Thrift Shop in my town of Cambridge. They have tons of good stuff for little money. I’m bringing much of it to the Mansion when I teach my meditation class on Friday.

Maria and I bought a box or two of decorations for the farmer’s market Christmas tree, and we took it over to Casey Face, who is working on assembling the FM’s Christmas celebration as if she didn’t have enough to do.

I feel the pull of community as much of the country continues to divide.

Casey is involved in a score of groups, she has a lot of things to do.

We bought 20 “Ugly Sweaters” for the Mansion “Ugly Sweater Christmas Party,” I’ll bring them to the Mansion tomorrow (Friday) when I go for my meditation class. They cost $10 altogether.

 

There was some lovely discarded jewelry at the Senior Citizens Thrift Shop. I bought 30 pieces of jewelry for $one apiece, $30 all together. It’s going to the Mansion tomorrow.

29 November

Book Report. A Wonderful Novel To Recommend, A Plea To Stop Sending Me Boxes Of Things Without Asking.

by Jon Katz

I think this will be the book of the year for me. North Woods, by Daniel Mason, is the story of a House built in Massachusetts and its occupants over more than 300 years. It is brilliantly and creatively written, and it knocked my socks off when I started reading it two days ago.

I guess you’d call it historical fiction. It begins with a pair of young lovers in colonial New England who escape the wrathful Pilgrim’s judgment by fleeing into the then-wild woods of western Massachusetts.

They get away from the grim pursuers who are trying to force them back so they can be thrown in jail. They are chased by “solemn men” with harquebuses cocked in their elbows. They get away and the novel continues the story in surprising and inventive ways by chronicling the lives of the people who followed them in the Yellow House for three centuries.

I love every page of it, it is often surprising, telling the story of all kinds of people, from the Apple Man to a Revolutionary Loyalist and author to an amateur historian who believes that bodies are buried on the property.

I highly recommend this book, it stands out in a good year for books and is breathtakingly creative. I stopped reading every other book to read this one. It’s a beautiful book, gripping and beautifully and inventively told.

__

 

But I have a problem I want to share.

Yesterday, I got a fabulous book gift from a nun named Sister Lucy, who has been reading my blog and picked up a book she was sure I would love. She is right.

The book is called ” Becoming Who You Are”  and was written by James Martin and inspired by the lives of Thomas Merton and Henry Nouwen, two of my favorite spiritual authors and guides. I write about them all the time.

Lucy nailed my interests and spiritual curiosity, and I love the book and will soon be writing about it. I read it in a half-hour. It was only 90 pages and very inexpensive; it is my perfect gift now.

I also got a letter the same day from a good man far away (I won’t use his name). This was different.

He said he was sending me a box so large it was packed to the bursting point and marked “do not open with the knife” for fear of damaging the clothes stuffed into it. “And also,” he wrote, “a book from the 1950s that I’ve loved reading” and thought I might enjoy. It’s about homeless people in NYC in the 1950s and focuses on their eccentric and exciting approaches to life.”

He said he loved reading about NY in the 1950’s and assumed I would be interested.

Before writing this, I braced myself.

One or two members of the social media yenta police will be messaging me early in the morning and calling me an ingrate or cruel bastard for asking this not to happen and not thanking the man. I thanked him and asked him not to do that anymore.

This is a problem for me, not only because I am an ingrate but because I dislike throwing out things other people treasure or want to get rid of. And we have run out of room for big and unwanted boxes. It takes days and weeks to eliminate them or search for takers, and we are backed up. That is not my job; that is not the way my work works.

I sometimes feel like a Good Will Reception Center.

Our small farmhouse is crammed with boxes and books, most things nobody wants or has asked about.

Sister Lucy sent me a small, thin book I knew nothing about and am happy to get. She had no time at her conference to mail me.

The man who sent them knew my e-mail, he wrote to warn me to tell me the box was “packed to the bursting point,” which made me cringe, and not in joy.

I wish he had just taken the trouble to ask me if I needed another huge stuffed box of things I did not need or wanted to read.

Then, I could explain whether or not I could use these things or anyone else could. And have them shipped where they ought to go.

I will be honest: I am not interested in homelessness in New York in the 50’s. There is no way I will get to this book in the next year, and I am not interested in the subject. That means I will never read it.

The social media yentas do not understand that courtesy is not defined by doing things one doesn’t want to do or can’t do. It comes from finding out what people need and helping them get it, if possible.

My rule is that I never buy anything for anyone I was not asked to get or that I am not 100 percent certain it is needed.

The Mansion aides know to tell me when a resident wants something. So do the residents.

Sue Silverstein only asks me for what she needs and rarely does that. If I see a Mansion resident walking in slippers outside, I know to get them shoes.

That is the way it ought to work. I don’t show up at either place with stuffed boxes for them to sort through. They don’t have staff or time for that. I don’t want to be a Good Will Reception Center.

I hope that helps clarify things. This being America, someone will be offended. My e-mail is [email protected]. Recommendations are welcome.

Questions are answered. I am very available. And we love the packages, hats, and supplies so many of you send this way. Truthfully, I appreciate them and please don’t stop. But the ones we love the most are the ones who ask. We respond quickly and gratefully.

Please take advantage of that so I can’t waste or toss out your valuable things or fall over them. I’m picky about the books I read and can afford to buy them, which I prefer. Sister Lucy is an excellent example of an exception..

If you are eager to buy me a book or gift or send me huge packages, please take the trouble to e-mail me first, and I will take the trouble to answer you. That does not feel ungrateful to me.

It seems the embodiment of courtesy and thoughtfulness.

It’s simple. Just ask: [email protected]. We are out of room.

15 November

From Texas A Box Of Beauty And Joy: “I Know You Can Find A Home For All This Handiwork, Fromy My Grandothers, Great Aunts, Mothers And Mother-In-Law

by Jon Katz

Carol Wayne is the only woman in her generation of her family.

She sent Maria a gorgeous box of vintage linens and sewing and fiber works, perhaps the only creative work women in rural Texas were expected to do. This huge box arrived at our post office yesterday. I had trouble carrying it to the car; it was so big.

We didn’t know it was coming, but we have found that women are reluctant to part with the linens and napkins of their mothers and grandfathers.

They want it to end up in good hands, the hands of someone who cares enough about that amazing handiwork to ensure it lives on and is seen.

They can’t bear to see it thrown away and forgotten. And they trust Maria to live it and do right by it.

Some of it goes to Maria and almost all to the students in Sue Silverstein’s excellent art class at Bishop Gibbons High School. Sue will flip over this.

It’s a great gift for Maria, whose art is based on beautiful and discarded things.

“As my husband and I prepare to move out of our home of 32 years, we have found boxes of “stuff,” she wrote, “passed down to me – I am the only girl in my generation. I know you can find a home it – either you, the art students, the Mansion, or any other creative types. Thank you for taking it on and passing it forward.

‘Sincerely, Carol Wayne.

She also sent $40 with a P.S. “Have Lunch On Me!”

Maria will go over the box, and whatever she can’t use will go to Bishop Gibbons this coming Friday when we visit the school.

This touched my heart, the wish of all that beautiful handiwork and the wish of the last female survivor in her family to ensure her forbear’s work is not forgotten( the work inside the box is gorgeous.)

We went to Subway today and spent the $2o on two veggie wraps.

Thanks, Carol; you remind me that people are good and are eager to do good. Thanks for trusting us with this precious material; we will do well with it. You also remind me that people are good, given the chance.

And we had a nice and healthy lunch on you.

Carol is from a small town in Texas.

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