The writer John Updike inspired me in a number of ways that affect my work and creative life, years after I heard him speak about creativity and read his ideas about creating things, especially books, essays, poems and artistic images. First, he said that real writers write, every day, in every way they can. They learn when they are the most creative hours and they protect and cherish that time all of their lives.
Writers don’t take scores of workshops, agonize in writer’s groups, whine about the traumas of publishing, list all of the reasons why they are no good, why they can’t make a living, why nobody will ever like their awful stuff, why their lives are so difficult. They go out and do it, every day, any way they can. That is my creed, my mantra, creativity is a fire within, it burns or it doesn’t.
This week I am reading the new biography “Updike,” by Adam Begley. Updike was as creative and vibrant at the end of his life as he was at the beginning – perhaps more so. He published 26 novels in 49 years, countless poems, essays and short stories in between. He took his own life and shaped and re-shaped it, told and re-told it. The biography is re-inspiring me in my writing, my books, my blog, my photography. Most of all, in my discipline. Create fearlessly, Updike said, every day of your life.
Writers just write, there is so much truth to that. Artists paint, they create, they sew and weave, they photograph and create verse, they sculpt and draw. They create fearlessly and relentlessly, they send their works out into the world, they put themselves out there every, they come out, often in painful or frightening or uncomfortable ways. The process of creation is heroic to to me, small acts of bravery in a fearful time. Updike believed the writer and artist continuously share what he called the “digested”part of their lives. That is the theory of my blog, from the very first day to now. You may get some undigested parts as well.
I love this idea of creation. Every day, a lottery of sorts. You may get the good Jon Katz today or the bad Jon Katz, , I might make sense to you or not, I might touch your emotions or make you smile or cry. Hopefully, all of the above. People will often surprise me and patronize me by saying they continue to read my books and my blog even though they often disagree with me, as if their reading my work is a favor, a gift, generously bestowed despite my idiosyncratic thoughts and words. To me, that is a narrow, even sad idea about creativity, the very antithesis of it. It’s the ideas that challenge and provoke me that I need the most, creation is a gift all of it’s own, nothing touches and inspires more people or gives them the inspiration or the strength to love their lives.
My writing is not about what other people think, it is about what I think, I am the one who must look in the mirror each morning and feel good about who I am and what I am doing. My work is certainly not about my concern with others but my concern with self, not of timidity and the need for approval but of dignity and pride. My standard is not the approval of a neighbor or reader but of self-respect – I seek the approval of me.
I love the idea of creating fearlessly, I have had it since I was a little boy, John Updike gave me a name for it. Every day I meet or hear from someone who has permitted their creative spark to be shut down by the nature of the world, by the cruelty or indifference or discouragement of parents or teachers or friends or critics or siblings. I want to grab each one and shout Updike’s idea to them: create fearlessly, every day, for yourself and your own self-respect.
This week, I am thinking about creating fearlessly, and I’ll devote all of it to Mr. Updike and his legacy:
– Thursday night, for the first time in my life, I am taking my poems to a poetry reading at the Round House Cafe, Cambridge, N.Y. I am not comfortable in groups generally, I like to create by myself, and just put it all out there, but a friend told me he will read his poems if I will read mine. Fair enough. Don’t just do what I say, do what I do. I’ll choose a Divine Old Dog poem and one about walking on the path. I’m looking forward to it.
– My friend George Forss, the great photographer, is spending most of next week in New York. He told me this morning that he would love to take some photos of the New York Carriage Horses with me, and that is an exciting idea for me. I am thinking about going next Thursday.
– My writing life. As I mentioned, my life-long publisher, Random House and I have parted company in a very respectful and amicable way. I need something different, I suspect they do too, it is just time, no fault, no foul. So I am hanging out there, going to meetings, talking about my next book, my special project, “Talking To Animals.” There is considerable interest in this book, I’ve had some wonderful meetings about it, I have not ever been without a book contract, it is strange for me, a big part of me missing. It is a part of creating fearlessly, I must keep doing my work, respecting my self, following my passion. I feel good about it, I have a great book (more than one) to do, a committed and respected agent and Updike’s call to the fearlessness of creativity rings still in my head and heart.
