I finished painting two of the new gates on the Pole Barn, I got this itch that we needed some color on the new gates. Took four four hours each gate, the sun and the flies wore me down. I have a bit of touching up to do, but I’m glad we got to it in time for the Open House on Columbus Day weekend. Next week at this time, Bud will be here hopefully, and life will be differentl.
Before there is Paradise, say the prophets of Kabbalah, there is a barren desert, then darkness.
My rules for finding the light, and moving away from the darkness and the anger:
I seek to do good, not to argue about what good is.
I do not mourn what I have lost, I celebrate what I have.
I live in the present, not the past, and look to the future with hope and strength.
Fear is a bluff, an idea, a geography, a space to cross, again and again.
My search to create Light out of darkness, in my own life and beyond, is an expression of humanity’s deepest longing and greatest desire: to be the source and cause of my own happiness.
I take responsibility for my life. No one can can give me the life I seek but me, no one can take it from me.
I do not speak poorly of my life and my work, it is listening. Everyone suffers, everyone is fighting their own battles. I take responsibility for my brokenness, but my life, like everyone else’s life, is full of challenge and struggle. Grace is my response.
I have never known argument to solve a problem or make it go away. There is always another way.
I stand in my truth and open my life. I have no secrets to hide.
I practice radical acceptance and radical forgiveness. Everyone does the best they can.
I respect nature and the animal world, animals are not my dependents or children, they are my partners in our journey through life. Mother Earth is my sister.
On the other side of paradise is fear, the spouse of darkness.
Love is the point.
We each hear our own voices. Those are the things I tell myself every day.
I looked out the window this morning and saw the thick fog over the pastures and the Red Barn, I ran outside naked with my camera and took some photos. This is a picture you can’t wait for because the sun will burn the fog off and I love to see the farm shrouded in mist.
How beautiful it was out there, and how cold. As the mist began to lift, I scrambled back into the house.
About eight years ago, I spotted this leather jacket in a thrift shop and I bought it for Maria. We both loved it, but it ended up in a closet and she forget about it. Yesterday, she found it and it was covered with grime and dust, even some mold.
She fell in love with the jacket all over again, and I’m hell bent on restoring it.
I spent a good hour scrubbing it with soap and water and am heading to the hardware store this morning to get some leather oil. I love this jacket, and am determined to bring it back to life. It belongs on Maria as the chill weather comes.
It’s less than a week when Bud comes to us, assuming he passes one more heartworm test on Friday. We are ready – dog beds, crates, all we need is some treats.
Carol Johnson, who has been nurturing Bud back to health, says she is cracking down (dog biscuits only!). I’m dubious, Carol is one big squishy heart, she has a hard time resisting Bud’s imploring us, he loves to snack.
And I don’t blame her, she seems the awful ways in which some of these dogs have suffered, it is hard not to spoil them a bit.
But there is other news today from Carol and South Arkansas regarding Boston Terriers.
Carol says she is going Monday to pick up a female Boston Terrier found a few days ago starving in the woods in South Arkansas, where Carol lives.
Carol works with Friends Of Homeless Animals, a rescue group I support. And it will be a lucky dog if she falls into Carol’s care.
She said it seems the dog was abandoned in the woods – this happens often in Arkansas she says – and was living there for weeks or months, she is emaciated down to less than 10 lbs, she is all bones and cuts and sores.
Carol says sometimes when she gets to a home where a dog is being held, the dog has already been given away.
But if the dog is still there, she will bring it to the vet for testing, it is almost sure to have heartworm like Bud. And she may suffer from other health issues as well, Carol doesn’t know how old she is.
I must admit when I heard this story, I wanted to adopt the dog on the spot, but there is much to be learned about her first, assuming she falls into the loving and capable hands of FOHA and Carol.
Maria and I are both agree that three dogs are enough for us, given what else is going on. Still, I am a bit wobbly on this. But she will find a home, I’m sure. Lots of people wanted Bud.
The poor dog will be in good hands with Carol and FOHA, know how to bring dogs back from the edge of life, they are patient and committed and loving.
Carol says she will let me know about the dog when she sees her and gets her to the vet, if that happens. I’ll follow this story and let people know, this is a dog, I feel, that must get to a good home.
In any case, if all goes well with his tests, Bud will be on a big truck heading to Brattleboro, Vt. at noon Saturday, when we will go and meet him and bring him home. I am excited.
From Gus to Bud, though megaesophagus and loss and Bud’s own struggle, this is a rich and powerful tale. From the minute I saw him on the FOHA website and spoke with Carol, I felt Bud belong at Bedlam Farm and so did Maria.
I have a strong feeling we shall see him on Saturday. Come on home, Bud. You’ve had enough trouble and stress for any dog this year, time to find peace and safety and love here at Bedlam Farm. Like Gus before you, you’ll get to meet a lot of people at the Open House, if you’re up for it.
And who knows what the fates have in store? Maybe there will one day be a BT sister.
