I got up early this morning to think about my book “Going Home” as I begin the book tour. I thought that even though it is sad to lose animals, that is not what I am about or the book. It is okay to grieve, and each of us has to grieve in their own personal way. But I wrote the book to be empowering. To help people move through grief and loss if that is what they wish. “Going Home” is, above all things, a celebration of love and life, and the very human ability to move on. But that is not my choice. It’s yours.

I got some e-mails from people this week telling me they are too grief-stricken and depressed to even read this book and I wondered, why are they e-mailing me? If they are too sad to deal with the subject, that is their choice, but there isn’t much I can do to help them.  The book is very much about coming to terms, and moving on if you are ready. As I set out on the book tour, I am thinking of how much I love the animals in my life, how happy and grateful I am to have them, how much joy and pleasure they have given me. That is not depressing.

The book is not depressing either, quite the opposite. It is meant to be affirming, to help people deal with guilt, loss and sadness that we all feel when we lose an animal we love. And the loss is very painful, very deep. I am happy that people who have read the book tell me they felt better right away. That’s great, that’s the point. That is the embodiment of empowerment.

The message from “Going Home” is not grim. It is for people who want to feel better, be better. It  affirms the power of the individual to deal with loss and pain in a helpful and sympathetic – even joyous –  way. That is affirming to me, empowering. I can’t – don’t – tell people how to feel. Or how to grieve. Not up to me.

I love almost everything about my dogs and my life with animals, and each one of them is a cause for celebration and gratitude for me. And yes, loss, too.

But I learned in hospice work that death and loss is sad, but not only that. It can also be beautiful, celebratory, uplifting in the sense that life goes on, we can affect our own emotion lives, shape our lives in the way that we wish. I look forward to getting out into the country and talking with you. But I warn you, I am not sad or grim and neither is my book.