It was strange, watching the Northeaster howl through our plans. I see plans as wishful thinking, a way I’d like to see things go, but rarely do. E-mail goes out,  storms come in, animals get sick, fences and pipes bust. Glad to be heading home. The book tour is winding down but a couple of weeks more or less, to go. I love the beauty of the Vineyard, but I know I could not live here. Upstate New York is very real to me, and I think I need that. It inspires and informs my life, my work. Herman, my scary voice in the night came to visit and he told me I was sick, dying, broke, in danger. Go away, I said. You really need to find somebody else to be with.

And then I realized that I love Herman, he has been with me more than anybody, my parents, siblings, friends. I’d like him to find somebody else to be with, but there is a part of me that would hate to see him go, I suppose, or he would be gone. I think we are winding down our time together, a ballet of love, need, fear and life. I am going to the next place, and I wish the same for him.