In the political morass and division troubling America, I try to think about holidays and their meaning. They don’t mean bargains on Amazon or the nearest mall. I can buy stuff any day. I have to figure out my idea of what a holiday should be.
I’m a history buff, and I’ve learned that the simple myth of Thanksgiving – the American family gathering together in love and compassion – is mostly a myth, especially the part that portrays the holiday as a sweet story of Pilgrims coming together with Native Americans who gave them food to share the bounty of our country.
It’s a lovely story, but it has very little reality.
Americans are just beginning to come to terms with what our founders and politicians have done to Native Americans, as well as enslaved people. If we are giving thanks, it is for something other than a shared meal.
On top of our changing understanding of history, corporations increasingly overrun holidays, re-imagining holidays as celebrations of bargains at Amazon and other commercial profit-making ideas.
(We had snow last night and rain this morning.)
My inbox is drowning in Black Friday discounts, not family forgiveness or historical myths. We are teaching a generation of children to workshop bargains, not kindness or spirituality.
What can I do? I can see the day differently. I don’t need anyone’s help in guidance when it comes to that.
Thanksgiving is more meaningful to me – as well as more straightforward. There is no need to manipulate the truth to celebrate a day with the people we care about. Truth is natural, like light; we should leave the truth alone and not interfere with it or invent it.
For many people, this is a celebration of family. Maria and I have no families to celebrate with; we have decided to be alone and at peace.
(In winter, the chickens only come out if they can see the ground. They can’t this morning.)
On this Thanksgiving, what I am doing is not complicated. I’m lighting up the lamp of honesty and authenticity to illuminate our day in any way we choose. I plan to generate the energy of individuality and self-awareness. For me, the holiday is about everything that is happening in the now that I love and am grateful for. Life is a gift, no matter how it goes.
Here on the farm, Thanksgiving is about celebrating life, for all its twists and turns, and honoring what we have, not what we have lost or wish for.
The holiday is not about arguments, grievances, or resentment. I see it as taking some deep breaths with Maria and giving thanks for our life and life together, for all the good we try to do, for all the good people who support us, and for all the animals that have guided us as magical helpers and opened us up to the reality of life and love.
(Future quilts of Full Moon Fiber artists.)
It’s cold and wet today. I will search for more sweaters for the Mansion’s “Ugly Sweater” party at Christmas. I hope to have a quiet hour and think about what makes me happy and hopeful. There are quite a few things like that.
Robin in the snow.
Our “Books” sign was one of the first things I bought when I came upstate. I threw out a worm sign because so many people stopped by looking for worms to fish wish. Nobody stops by wanting books (except for our Little Free Library out front). I like the “heal” sign. Maria put a skeleton from the woods on top of it.
I have never understood the emphasis on one single day during the holidays. I am thankful for the blessings in my life every day, I don’t need a holiday to remind me of all my life has brought me. I worked the first half of my life in the horse industry, so there was never a day off, the second half of my life has been spent at the bedside in health care, so I still work most holidays, 12 hour shifts. Tomorrow I will be at work, my coworkers and I will be grateful if we can just get ten minutes to sit down together to enjoy a quick bite as a group. It’s unlikely that will happen. But being at work, either with horses or in health care, doesn’t mean you cannot still be grateful. I’m grateful for my job and for my coworkers. When I was working with horses, being alone in the barn on holidays was wonderful. Who better to spend a holiday with than the horses, dogs and barn cats? The holiday is just one day out of the year.
Enjoy your day in whatever way is meaningful to you.
Thank you, Jon, your words gave me pause and helped me refocus from some sadness and nostalgia about the many big Thanksgiving parties we used to host for family & friends, most of whom have passed now. We retired 700 miles away from the big urban area where we lived & worked all our lives, to a peaceful rural homestead in the redwoods we dearly love – but far from our 2 adult daughters. We are truly blessed that one of them left a very bad relationship, moved up here (during COVID!) and made a happy new life for herself; she and her new guy (who’s so good for her) will celebrate with us tomorrow. Elder daughter & the grandbabies are with her husband’s side for T-Day but they’ll come up here for Christmas. So, we’ll miss them but you’ve reminded me to focus on the huge blessings we have right now, the miracle of younger daughter’s escape and healing from a long, bad relationship and the happiness she’s found here with her devoted, caring and delightful new man these past 2+ years. We will focus on “everything that is happening in the now that I love and am grateful for.” I am also grateful for you, Maria and your illuminating, thought-provoking and beautiful blogs I’ve been following for so many years now. Happy Thanksgiving and thank you!
Your photos here again remind me of Wyeth. More color than he ever used but the subjects are like his. The one of the farm across the field especially. Imagine each of the photos painted in the Wyeth color palette….. I m telling ya you both see the same beauty .Don’t worry I won’t keep pestering you with this!
Its a great pleasure Margaret never stop
Wishing you and Maria a blessed Thanksgiving. I just picked up Mexican food, my fav, for my meal tomorrow. Going to read the latest Richard Osman book. Really enjoying the series In the early evening, I read your blog; so enjoy and appreciate all the photos of the farm and the animals, the rest of your family. Am sending some blog and mansion support.
My sister and I spent the best day today at the Senior Center. We shared a table with four others. Food was good. Conversation was better. Pumpkin pie was the best.
Happy Thanksgiving Jon & Maria. I give thanks for both of you; for your compassion, your creativity, your kindness, your common sense and willingness to share your unique lives with all of your readers. Have a lovely day, whatever you choose to do.
Happy Thanksgiving Jon and Maria. I have enjoyed your books and writings for many years and I have one of Maria’s magnets on my fridge. Your life together with your animals is an inspiration. I live alone now in a retirement community at 88 years young and have a sweet rescued cat as my dear companion. I am blessed in that my children visit when they are able and my health is still pretty good. I will cook myself some pot roast and reflect on days gone by when we had large family gatherings. I am very grateful to be where I am at this stage of my life and I am happy.
Enjoy your quiet day together and thank you so much for sharing your life with us.