My Mansion reading today: Sit Like A Mountain: Sitting quietly, quietly breathing in and out, we develop strength, concentration, and clarity. So sit like a mountain. No wind can blow the mountain down.” – Thich That Hahn.
___
I talked to several Mansion aides recently, and they told me that the staff needs help running bingo games. The residents, I am told, get intensely competitive, even sometimes to the point of throwing things and yelling at the winners and each other.
(Above, Ellen from Memory Care; below, Art, who says little but loves anything related to cars.
When I asked where the problem was, members of my meditation class were cited as the worst sports at losing. After teaching three years of meditation and calming breathing, I was startled. The three mentioned were among my class’s quietest and most enthusiastic meditators (none were present today.)
They love the breathing exercises and the meditations themselves. But it’s unfair to blame them for their behavior. In my class, they are lovely and calm. But it’s a difficult time, and Bingo takes on great importance to people who need a win.
One of the Bingo managers came to me today and asked if I could speak with the unruly meditation class members and give them tools other than shouting and throwing things to work with. I said I would take this up next week when everyone was present. Today was a shopping day at Walmart, and the problem was that people were absent.
This will be an exciting challenge, as the aides believe the ones who get angry get help themselves. They said they’d welcome any help. I’m going to do some research and come up with some ideas.
Art after meditating.
Every week, an aide walks Art from meditation class to the cafeteria, and he needs clarification if he walks alone. Art is a sweet and kind man.
That’s quite a problem, but understandable, especially if some of the folks joining in have some cognitive issues. I work for Home Instead in Saratoga, and I do many workshops for seniors, and teach meditation techniques and stress management to them, so I love reading about your work at The Mansion! I am wondering if maybe some meditation time prior to Bingo would help at all? Or even a break time in the middle for some time to regroup? Before many of the groups I do, I like to start with some meditation and deep breathing for just a couple minutes to clear our minds and offer some grounding. It can be very stimulating and even a little overwhelming for folks. And yet, so important to keep doing, I love that they have Bingo! Thank you so much for sharing every day, and for all of your work with our seniors, who are not revered enough. You, Maria, Zinnia and the Mansion staff are all angels!
Best to you,
Maria
Hahah…It’s those quiet ones that you’ve got to watch out for!!
When I was fairly new to recovery, and was learning how to “do” spirituality, I would get angry from time to time, and would stomp and yell, and felt like I was getting nowhere. I felt like I was “bad” at the spiritual thing. My counselor told me this, that when a person begins to self-reflect, it seems to open some very old hatches to long buried feelings. Those feelings must come out, and will sometimes come out in inappropriate ways. I was taught the “pause, pray, proceed” tactic in order to appropriately express my anger. It isn’t stuffing the anger, it gives my brain the chance to lead from the present moment, rather than my anger leading from the past. Lordy, this takes time and practice. I had an episode of anger and yelling yesterday, at a cat of all things, after 20 years of recovery. Again, for a few minutes, I felt like I am “bad,” and then I remembered to pause, pray, proceed. And I felt better. Yeesh. Never too old to keep on practicing and learning.