“Listen,

this was his life.

I bury it in the earth,

I sweep the closets,

I leave the house.

I mention them now,

I will not mention them again.

It is not a lack of love

nor lack of sorrow.

But the iron thing they carried,

I will not carry.

I give them – one, two, three, four – the kiss of courtesy,

of sweet thanks,

of anger, of good luck in the deep earth.

May they sleep well. May they soften.

But I will not give them the kiss of complicity.

I will not give them the responsibility for my life.”

• Mary Oliver, Flare